I must be feeling really cheerful today...

[Aurangzeb Khan]

Earth, England, Today, Unfortunately:

Jeremy says:
oohhh my favourite Blessed person is being sainted!
Ardy says:
the cunt of calcutta?
Jeremy says:
no, the arse of austria
Ardy says:
ok - explain
Jeremy says:
Blessed Emperor Charles Habsburg has conducted a micracle and so is on the path to sainthood
Ardy says:
Habsburgs... bloody tribe of inbreed cleft-palletted cunts
Ardy says:
gained their empire through marriage but at the cost of marrying their own fourteen times over
Jeremy says:
well Charles was evidentally good enough for God
Ardy says:
anyway - you ain't even a Catholic so why are you accepting the validity of the Vatican's selection procedures?
Jeremy says:
because of the motto of his life: "I strive always in all things to understand as clearly as possible and follow the will of God, and this in the most perfect way".
Ardy says:
every sincere Christian is a saint, your pathetically deluded fellow believers are a whole community of saints
Saints particularly worthy of veneration used to be decided upon by the acclamation of believers until the Papacy decided it wanted to take control of procedures as another means of dominating the universal church through the monopolisation of favours
Ardy says:
fucking bollocks - even if there is a god he is hardly going to manifest himself in the efforts of a deluded mammal trying to prop up his tottering control of a lousy multi-ethnic Empire called Austria-Hungary on a frankly unimpressive wet rock orbiting a dismal sun
Jeremy says:
well God loves you despite your evil ways
Ardy says:
Mercifully there is no so I am spared the hassle of rejecting his love
Jeremy says:
you keep telling yourself that and one day we'll see who's right
Ardy says:
but we won't see because once we're dead we'll have lost our cognitive functions
Jeremy says:
anyway, Bastille day on monday!
Ardy says:
and mercifully half the equipment of the French Army will be broken or unfit for parade due to lack of funds for maintenance... an ideal time for Sudan to invade Chad and make Sarkozy look like even more of a pathetic arse than he already is
Jeremy says:
or an ideal time to celebrate freedom, either way
Ardy says:
and the terror which followed the deluded and naive attempt to establish a perfect society and led to the deaths of many many Frenchmen - it is truly a day for the English to celebrate
Jeremy says:
do you ever get bored of being so inexplicably pessimistic?
Ardy says:
No of course not and that wasn't pessimism...

[KingJeremy]

Don't you just hate it when people quote you without asking?

[Aurangzeb Khan]

Yes but you know how it is - Hesam quotes me, I quote you, you quote me, I quote Hesam... the world explodes... the end.

[Kaiser Ayreon]

Ardashir

You're such an evil person, do you know that? I still want to marry you, though.

[Aurangzeb Khan]

Fair enough.

[Krasniy Yastreb]

The only thing more terrifying than Ardy's presence in micronations, is micronations without the presence of Ardy. Imagine it for a second.

*shudder*

[Hesam Jayatar]

That monologue goes in my top ten "greatest things written in this embarrassingly pathetic hobby" list. And it goes in my top FIVE "greatest things written on this embarrassingly pathetic planet" list.