Dirge for a Dark Winters Night

[Brrapa Lu'Eraro]

Mortis Mercator V, Kaiser of Shireroth is dead. Bereft of life, deceased, pushing up the daisies, joined the choir invisible, an ex parr...Kaiser.

Let us not forget that it's not so much that he is dead, but that he's simply not breathing anymore, or ever again. Blood doesn't flow in the correct directions in his body. So, he's gone, but it's not that he's not with us anymore, but more in that he's just a corpse now resting on that funeral pier right there, the one with the explosives under it. Yes, that one, you twit in the back...

But let us not mourn is life, but more celebrate his death...wait.. yes...no. Let us celebrate the fact that he has been taken from us, and will some day return to this land in the End Times to defend us from the Legions of Balgurd. To join in glorious battle with the gods and Kaisers old, slaughtering those that would seek the destruction of this world.

Let us remember the good deed that he performed, and the glory of his name. Let us remember that every cloud has a high moisture content. And that the grass is always greener after it's been fertilized with cow dung. Let us remember how he killed the Kaiser before him for being inept, despite the fact that he was already the Kaiser and didn't really need to kill Letifer III, but it suited his idiom...

And remember, when at first you don't succeed, try pushing the ON button.

Amen!

LIGHT THE FIRE!

*funeral pier is let and explosives go off scattering little bits of dead Kaiser all over the country side for miles around.*

[Prodigy Almighty]

A true and fitting BO0O/\/\ist burial!

[Kaiser Loki II]

(sobs softly)

[Liam conToketi]

May he rest in peace. *bows head*

[Erik Mortis]

Or pieces as the case may be.

[h4773r's Herald]

*slowly, reverently, and trying not to puke, picks pieces of Mors off of himself*

He went out with a bang. B00/\/\!

[hypatias mom]

*Baroness Carol shakes the pieces of Mors V from her parasol, bows reverently, throws a couple of grenades in his honor, and departs sadly for home.*

We shall not see his like again. He will be greatly missed. RIP Mors V.

[Kaiser Loki II]

(quiet sobbing)