YAC Manoeuvres
Posted: Tue Jul 15, 2008 5:39 pm
(Pat attention... OR DIE!)
Duke Benkern strode up the parade ground, a "YAC For Dummies" book in one hand and a hefty mango in the other. This was the first time the Corps had been assembled since he had risen to the Ducal throne. Sure, on occasion things had been annexed by minor nobles, but mainly there had been few proper annexations. But all that was about to change.
Before him hundreds of Yardistanis marched in time across the tarmac, their shiny shiny yellow boots gleaming in the hot Mar Saran sun, clicking in time to the drums. Fort Suryo had been empty for so long until the Marechaussee had recently moved in. Now it was probably the most active military installation in the Duchy.
Benkern reached a stage at the top of the field and as he adjusted his tie a small brass band blared out the tune from the verse of the hymn of the soviet union. The Corpsmen began an oval course of well choreographed marching before the wooden structure upon which stood their Anarch. Benkern began his address.
"The most annoying weapon in the world is a Yardistani Corpsman and his stickers. You must harness your annoying instinct if you wish to fulfil your expectation as a Corpsman. If your instincts are not clear and strong, you will hesitate just before you slap that YAC sticker on the forehead of that girl with the huge spam. You will not be irritating beyond belief. You will become embarrassed Corpsmen and then you will be in a world of crap, because Corpsmen who hesitate are probably going to be shot. By their superior officers. Often by accident. Actually, that goes for Corpsmen who don't hesitate too.
"Today, you are no longer random Yardistanis off the street. Today, you are Men of the Corps. You're part of a controlled state of anarchy. Henceforth until the day you die, whichever Duchy you're pillaging, every Corpsman is your brother, or at least cousin. Most of you will feel compelled to, instead of annexing something for Yardistan and the Corps, annex something for yourself. At which point you will be killed. But remember this: Corpsmen are shot, mostly by their own bloodlusty commanders. That's pretty much what you're here for. But the Yardistani Annexation Corps lives forever. And that means *I* always get more stuff. You'll probably be forgotten though."
Scattered applause died out quickly before a member of the Ducal Guard at the back of the parade ground fired a rifle into the air, at which point immense clapping began. Benkern smiled and waved before descending from the platform. Soon after the Duke had retired to his cabin at the far end of the exercise field, the real manoeuvres began: picking mangoes from trees, stealing lolly pops from babies without them noticing, sticker-to-forehead combat, and even annexations of large areas one grain of dirt at a time (since no mass annexations are allowed). Truly this would be the start of a new era of YAC activity.
Duke Benkern strode up the parade ground, a "YAC For Dummies" book in one hand and a hefty mango in the other. This was the first time the Corps had been assembled since he had risen to the Ducal throne. Sure, on occasion things had been annexed by minor nobles, but mainly there had been few proper annexations. But all that was about to change.
Before him hundreds of Yardistanis marched in time across the tarmac, their shiny shiny yellow boots gleaming in the hot Mar Saran sun, clicking in time to the drums. Fort Suryo had been empty for so long until the Marechaussee had recently moved in. Now it was probably the most active military installation in the Duchy.
Benkern reached a stage at the top of the field and as he adjusted his tie a small brass band blared out the tune from the verse of the hymn of the soviet union. The Corpsmen began an oval course of well choreographed marching before the wooden structure upon which stood their Anarch. Benkern began his address.
"The most annoying weapon in the world is a Yardistani Corpsman and his stickers. You must harness your annoying instinct if you wish to fulfil your expectation as a Corpsman. If your instincts are not clear and strong, you will hesitate just before you slap that YAC sticker on the forehead of that girl with the huge spam. You will not be irritating beyond belief. You will become embarrassed Corpsmen and then you will be in a world of crap, because Corpsmen who hesitate are probably going to be shot. By their superior officers. Often by accident. Actually, that goes for Corpsmen who don't hesitate too.
"Today, you are no longer random Yardistanis off the street. Today, you are Men of the Corps. You're part of a controlled state of anarchy. Henceforth until the day you die, whichever Duchy you're pillaging, every Corpsman is your brother, or at least cousin. Most of you will feel compelled to, instead of annexing something for Yardistan and the Corps, annex something for yourself. At which point you will be killed. But remember this: Corpsmen are shot, mostly by their own bloodlusty commanders. That's pretty much what you're here for. But the Yardistani Annexation Corps lives forever. And that means *I* always get more stuff. You'll probably be forgotten though."
Scattered applause died out quickly before a member of the Ducal Guard at the back of the parade ground fired a rifle into the air, at which point immense clapping began. Benkern smiled and waved before descending from the platform. Soon after the Duke had retired to his cabin at the far end of the exercise field, the real manoeuvres began: picking mangoes from trees, stealing lolly pops from babies without them noticing, sticker-to-forehead combat, and even annexations of large areas one grain of dirt at a time (since no mass annexations are allowed). Truly this would be the start of a new era of YAC activity.
The list of YAC Annexations is on the 