Shireroth

Item:
It shall be noted that there occurred today in Shirekeep the accession of the Khan of Vijayanagara to the Mango Throne.

Having enjoyed a night of contemplation and sobriety the Khan mounted his state war elephant and proceeded with a significant retinue of armed followers from Fort Foley and joined the main processional avenue leading to Raynor’s Keep. At the entrance to the keep the nobility of the duchies (less the representatives of Monty Crisco) and the Imperial Counties, were ranged in two rows, one on each hand to make a lane leading inwards to the throne room. A herald proceeded before the Khan proclaiming his name and titles. Then each lord, according to his rank came forward to make an offering in supplication. It is anticipated that the high nobility will make their declarations subsequently.

A golden salver was presented, laden with confectionery, which being placed before the Khan he did consecrate with a certain form of words and eat a little thereof before distributing the rest amongst the grandees present along with bejewelled goblets into which were poured generous libations of the notorious Treesian Red which flowed unceasingly as the day progressed.

The Khan then entered the Keep itself which was under the resolute guard of the Imperial Forces appointed during his days as MoMA.

Upon entering the Throne Room the Khan took up the Sword of Vengeance without undue ceremony, save but to test the keenness of the blade upon the neck of an unrepentant Ocian prisoner of war taken at the Fall of La Terre. The result was satisfactory.

This being done the Kaiser gave a short statement:

“Know that we do claim descent from the noble Line of Steffki by means of a great-granddaughter of Kaiseress Aure I who was honourably inducted entirely of her own free will into the harem of my venerated ancestor Ardashir CXV Osmani, Emir of Raspur, and whose offspring included the great-great-grandfather of a certain Aurangzeb, who was the father of the first Ardashir of the revived line of the Khan's of Vijayanagara. It is in his honour that I declare myself to be Ardashir Piroz Aurangzeb al-Osmani-Steffki and shall assume the throne under the name of Kaiser Aurangzeb.

We live in a time of dire portents. Our illustrious predecessor Gaelen, the third of that name, did strive in vain to stem the growing tide of anarchy. We trust that with more vigorous measures we shall succeed. But know this, where there is chaos there is life, and where there is life there is the evidence of a greater design. All that has come to pass has done so for a reason. Soon this reason will become clear.”

With that the way was clear for the great magnates of the realm to speak their piece.

His Grace Duke Malliki of Brookshire cleared his throat.

"I hereby proclaim my, my duchy's and the Lakhesian nation's unending support for Kaiser Aurangzeb. May he sit upon the Golden Mango Throne in a long and prosperous reign. I also humbly accept the coronet of the office of Steward, to be executed faithfully and with due respect for the Charter and the word of the Kaiser."

Greg Russell spit on the floor.


Never will Yardistan bow to the butcher of Amity. I will have no part of this.


He left, and didn't look back.

The Duke of Goldshire greets you as both his bloodline brother and as his Imperial lord. The Duchy is at your personal service, mi'lord.

The Duchy of Goldshire offers you a summer home / steadfast within our realm, along the coast of Elsenar. It, much like most of Goldshire, has fallen into disrepair as of late, but its foundations are solid and it is quite defensible. The ducal renovation teams will work nonstop to bring it back to the glory that Your Niftiness deserves.

Because of an unfortunate series of events, the Duke of Elwynn did not appear at the ceremony. In his place however arrived a single black sheep.

Clipped to the sheep's wool was a note scrawled on a gum wrapper. It read :

Gum Wrapper wrote:I hope this gum wrapper survives reentry of the atmosphere and reaches you since I am currently aboard the Minerva and cannot be there in person. I did wish, however, to properly express Elwynn's full support behind you Ardy. All hail the Furor! Damn wriggly© is good.

That's a horrifically ambiguous statement. Are you saying all hail the Angry Kaiser or all hail Hitler's reincarnation? Either way, eek I mean all hail put down the swords put down the sword put down the sword

Monty Crisco and Dolor would like to take this time to restate our rebellion against the Throne, and our support of Yardistan in their protestations.

Jonas smiled, as he thought back to the words of some older Shirerithians: "it looks like every new Kaiser want to start with the number one, or at least a new original name not chosen by his or her ancesters."

A black stretch limo going at speeds over 100 mph made a quick stop right in front of Raynor's Keep. A man in a black suit got out of the front seat and opened the door. Out stepped Baron William Payne, who had just come from his own coronation just a few hours ago.

"Kaiser Aurangzeb, you have my complete loyalty, and may your reign be long (but not too long) and prosperous (but not too prosperous)"

Ardashir, I've known you for almost ten years now, and in that time, you've consistently been one of my favorite micronationalists to work with - and absolutely my favorite micronationalist to work against.

I've enjoyed all our many recwars, from the time you founded modern recwar almost single-handedly during the War of the Orchids, to the countless Hyperborean-Zjandarian struggles for Elwynn, to Hafiz Rhodri and the Badger's misadventures in the Redoubt War. And I've enjoyed all of our real conflicts even more - the various spy duels between SAVAK and SHINE, Babkha's occasional attempts to push alternate cartography organizations, the brief but interesting Grand Commonwealth - Shireroth cold war, even that one time you went totally insane and took over Lighthouse.

You're charismatic, a skilled leader, and have an incredible creative mind. Your rule over Babkha was that country's golden age, and with good reason. The various Shirerithian positions you've held - MoMA, Steward, et cetera - you've executed with talent and flair. Along with Max I put you as the strategic genius behind the meteoric rise of Ashkenatza, and I credit the fear you inspired in most of the micronational world with preserving the superpower status of a moribund Babkha long after it had ceased to deserve it.

And most of all, along with Eoin and Andreas and Harvey and a tiny handful of others, you're one of the rare people who shares my artistic vision of micronationalism - a four dimensional work of art in which every act of creation goes down in history to create a rich narrative constantly referred to and built upon that achieves a depth and complexity far beyond what the present-centered micronations of today can hope for. When I make some passing reference to the Far Reaches or the Unorthodox Crusade or the TYSOG affair in a story, you're the one who I'm always expecting to catch it - and probably incorporate it into something of your own. That's the kind of bond between two people that transcends politics or the shifting alliances of the moment.

In short, I am honored to have you as a countryman, and overjoyed to have you as Kaiser of Shireroth after all this time. I hope you bring to Shireroth as much prosperity as you have brought to all the other lands and countries under your command, and I am certain that your reign will be an enjoyable and exciting one.

On the other hand, I declare Hyperborea in revolt againt the Kaiserial throne, sign the treaty of alliance I have secretly negotiated with Yardistan, and swear allegiance to Kaiser Leto III.

Leto III?

Congratulations on your accession to the throne, your Niftiness.

Leto III? I'm confused by that one too. I must look into this...

The Dutchy of Kildare fully supports Kaiser Aurangzeb and swears loyal to him and the Empire!

The Duchy of Brookshire sends its regards and ask you to go stick your head up a duck's bottom.

An old man in tattered black garments slowly climbs the stairs to the foot of the Kaiser's throne. A golden light begins to grow around the figure, as his steps became more forceful and more rapid.

The Kaiser's guards begin to step backwards, seemingly against their wills, as the figure came three, two, one step from the Throne.

Kaiser Aurangzeb started to speak, and then the smile that turned the blood of many into ice came across his face as he recognized the figure who now stood (!) by the side of the Throne.

A shredded, tattered cloak fell to the floor to reveal the figure beneath, clad in of all things, a uniform that resembled that of a British Admiral, circa 1913. He bent one knee, and offered the hilt of his sword to the now-knowing Aurangzeb.

"Behold, Your Niftyness, I return out of chaos and death, and I offer this, the Sword of Madness, as proof of my loyalty to the Golden Mango Throne. Command me, in whatever hopefully highly paid position that you may thing me worthy of."

Turning to the assembled worthies in the hall, he began to speak:

"Let none think the Kaiser stands alone, for as former Duke of Elwynn, etc., I pledge him my loyalty. More than that, I name him Brother, and that whosoever shall stand against Kaiser Aurangzeb, let them know that they shall also stand against Loki, and shall feel the terror of the Sword of Madness!"

Malliki Tosha wrote:The Duchy of Brookshire sends its regards and ask you to go stick your head up a duck's bottom.

You're getting pathetic and annoying, Tosha.

Gents, even when we are busy murdering each other I would like to remind you to keep it civil and take it all in good part.

Jonas wrote:

Malliki Tosha wrote:The Duchy of Brookshire sends its regards and ask you to go stick your head up a duck's bottom.

You're getting pathetic and annoying, Tosha.

Chill, it's a quote from Pratchett.

In which case - what was the one where there was a revolt in Ankh-Morpork and both sides put up so many barricades that everybody lost track of who was barricading against whom?

Allot... its your time to shine, answer the question.

For truth, justice, and a hard-boiled egg!!!

I'm not that big of a nerd, I just act like one.

I want to say the Glorious Revolution of the 15th (I think) of May, but I'm not sure. That was more a case of they pushed the barricades forward until the other side was inside their barricades, and no one could really tell who was who anyway.

Can we roast the duck, or is it still alive?

As myself and foremost as the representative of the Republic of the Netherlands to most of Micras I hereby wish to congratulate Kaiser Arangzeb I with being Kaiser.

you can still roast a duck if its not dead, it's more fresh that way!