"Sightseeing"

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Maksym Hadjimehmetov
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Re: "Sightseeing"

Post by Maksym Hadjimehmetov »

'Goodbye, and good luck, my friend'
'I hope this isn't goodbye for good- but this time I'll come back with a medal at least'
Oorzhaknurbattarov chuckled, patted his good Cossack friend on the back, and presented him with a bottle of Cherry Vodka. He certainly knew what keeps Cossacks fired up for battle.
The Cossack Commander stroked his beared and grinned manically, shaking his friend by the hand and mounting his horse. His aide-de-camp came and strapped three grenade launchers to his back. What with the embroidered sword, rifle, knives and two pistols already adorning the vast Cossack warrior, Oorzhaknurbattarov was surprised he didn't just fall backwards off his horse. Panzerfausts are quite heavy, especially when loaded.
With a farewell and kick up of dust, seven hundred and fifty cossack horsemen with machine guns and flamethrowers thundered past- deafening the poor infantry commander and leaving a sandstorm of dust which would not clear for the next five minutes.
'Major?'
'Yes?'
'Why are they heading West'
'On a need to know basis, Corporal. And at the moment you needn't know a thing'.
Oorzhaknurbattarov strode off back to the stairs to the bunker as the last cossack vanished over the horizon to the mysterious West. It would be vengeance if anything, but would be a long journey for the Cossack Horsemen to the West.
Summary: 750 heavily armed cossack horsemen set off West from Modan-Lach under cover of darkness.

EDIT: Sorry for the double post, but forgot to post this also important move in my grand plan ;)
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Re: "Sightseeing"

Post by Nick Foghorn Leghorn »

The Naval Infantry made its way over the flooded city in their inflatable rafts, silently and swiftly moving away from the fray. The men grumbled, they would rather be in the middle of the battle, fighting hard for their honor, but the true battle was in the skies above them now, and they were needed elsewhere. So, for only the second time in their entire history, they withdrew from the battle.

As they reached the shore, or what now counted as the shore, they pulled their rafts up onto the bank and started marching East, across mainland Shireroth, towards Alexandretta and the Kaiser.
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Re: "Sightseeing"

Post by Kaiser Mors V »

*From a secret location in Alexandretta the Kaiser plays with a yo-yo as an officer comes up to him and bows*

"M'lord Kaiser, there is word that enemy forces have gotten wind that you are here. We must move you once again to a new secure and secret location. M'lord, we must flee this place."

*Still playing with his Yo-Yo the Kaiser responds distractedly.*

"My good man, have you ever seen the sunset in the hills to the north of here? Once as a young man I walked those hills with a girl so fair. Those were happy times. The sunsets from those hills were just spectacular, radiating gold and red off her hair... And afterwards we would remain, lost in each other, lost in the darkness. Have you ever been to those hills?"

*The Kaiser performed a few tricks while the officer responded in confusion and consternation*

"My Lord! We must flee this place. We must get you once more to safety, before this location is discovered. Sire?"

*The Kaiser swung the Yo-Yo out quickly, almost catching the officer in the head*

"Those were good days. Happy days. Why should I fear death? Are not I named for him? Why should I flee that which I seek?"

*Fearfully the officer backed up slightly, out of range of the spinning object the Kaiser was seeming to give all his conscious attention. With concern and frustration the officer politely spoke.*

"I'll come back later m'lord, and meanwhile make preparation for your departure. I swore an oath to keep you from harm to protect you from all that might do you harm. " *under his breath* "Even if that be yourself..."

*The officer bowed once more and made a hasty retreat, leaving the brooding Kaiser to his own thoughts and whispered words*

"We all have made oaths my friend, oaths we must keep. Even Kaiser's must keep their oaths, even when those that they give oath to do not fulfill their own ends."

*in the middle of a maneuver the Kaiser pushed the string of the Yo-Yo off his finger, releasing its momentum, sending it flying outward to smash into a wall and fall broken upon the floor. Staring at the broken object upon the floor the Kaiser mused.*

"And if the oath maker becomes an oath breaker, does an oath taker become free at last? Free to take the course he desires, to follow life's road to where his heart most requires?"

*reaching into a drawer the Kaiser pulls forth a small dagger with a flame design in the handle, and examines the blade, testing it with his finger tip. Lethal in its sharpness.*

"But an oath given, is an oath given. No matter what."

*With these words the Kaiser unleashes his emotions into the blade and stabs it into the desk beside him, and goes forth to find the officer who had just spoken to him, to make ready his own preparations*

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Re: "Sightseeing"

Post by Maksym Hadjimehmetov »

A jeep surrounded by four motorcycles sped across the barren Crestfall landscape near the Alexandrettan provincial border. The two Laqi soldiers inside arrived outside the keep of Alexandretta, and under cover of darkness rapped on the vast oak door. A whimpering voice confronted them
'Go away!'
'Sir, we've come to evacuate His Niftiness!'
The pair of eyes behind the grille looked the two officers up and down
'ID?'
The soldiers thrust their ID cards into the grille
'Look, we haven't any time before the rebels come here and take his Niftiness- we need to move NOW'
After a prolonged sigh, the door creaked open and the two officers marched up to the Kaiser's temporary residence.
'Your Niftiness- we have come to bring you to safety'
Before Mors had a time to reply, the officers seized him by the arms and marched him down to the awaiting jeep. Forgetting that the sovereign had power of life and death over him, the Laqi colonel was surprised when Mors broke free and ran all the way back to the keep.
'What the...'
Five minutes later, His Niftiness returned with his Yo-Yo, as well the imperial mango crown and sceptre, after minor hesitation. Now, he was all set to go.
The colonel whispered an order to the small squadron of troops he had brought along on the motorcycles. They marched into the keep in unison with rope, mines, nitroglycerine and a number of other assorted contraptions. After finishing their task of booby-trapping the now empty Keep of Alexandretta, they mounted the motorcycles and followed after the jeep for K'Tzuni. They would have to move under cover of the smaller roads shielded from view- if enemy reconnaisance saw them, His Niftiness was finished.

At long last, the Cossacks thundered past the fronteir with the former CIS and reached the spot where the bomber squadron had met with the agent, in the old Interstellar Airfield. Their instructions had been simple, however. There basically was no need for any documents or instructions- Crestfallen had to be saved.
'Right men, no holding back- kill who you can, burn what you can, destroy what you can' Roared the bearded Cossack commander, knocking back half the contents of the Cherry Vodka bottle. Loading his panzerfaust, he raised the Laqi Host's regimental flag, blue with adorned golden Laqi script, and galloped into Ardashirshar. As soon as the two flak towers at the top of Zurvan Avenue came into view, the commander ordered a volley of grenades and anti-tank rockets to be fired in the windows and at the flak cannons atop them. One cossack rode around the side of the towers and chucked gas grenades in the windows of each, just below the machine gun nozzles trained at his comrades, to smoke out the defenders. Placing a large piece of wood across the exit door, there would be no escape for the infidels.
With the gas as a diversion, the flak towers had more to bother about than the Cossack attackers, who thundered into town via Zurvan Avenue aiming for the industrial quarter producing the Vengeful Dervish Rockets. Hadjimehmetov had also instructed them personally to loot and burn the Khan's Palace.

Meanwhile, artillery fire still rains down on Central Shireroth as the fighter jets assigned to defend the Elwynn Dam bomber squadron take off from Lywind to engage the Zjandarians over Woodshire.




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Re: "Sightseeing"

Post by Aurangzeb Khan »

OOC

Oh eff off the city has a garrison you know. :p
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Re: "Sightseeing"

Post by Maksym Hadjimehmetov »

OOC

Yes, I'm quite aware of the fact. But you haven't posted any defence plan of them, nor have you referred to them retaliating against the attack on Ardashirshar. Therefore I think we can safely conclude that my Cossacks are currently sacking your city.
If you're talking about Alexandretta, it's not currently held by rebel troops- as stated in Nick's last post, they're only on their way. The Kaiser was going to have to evacuate anyway- I was merely helping him with that by sending the jeep over. I do read these posts, you know ;)
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Re: "Sightseeing"

Post by Prodigy Almighty »

OOC: If you do read the posts, you might have caught on to the fact that the Kaiser wasn't actually planning on leaving if I understood his meaning correctly...
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Re: "Sightseeing"

Post by Aurangzeb Khan »

Read the Grand Muster - see where the barracks are on the map and use your noggin you great tit. In addition. There is also the small matr of the river crossing. I must have missed that. Some unspecified bridge perhaps. Or perhaps the waves parted. Maybe the map was folded at that particular moment which saved you the bother of a detour. :p Anyway seriously. Missile or cossack which is going to reach its target first. Crestfallen by that reckoning is toast.

Some of us poor bastards have to go to work and can't be on hand to give instant rebuttals to your random lunges around the map. The more so if these are two moves in succession during the same day. This isn't about follows rules, or the hypothetical cost of rebuilding something that only exists in a creative writing exercise, this about the principle of every action having a reaction and simple the bloody etiquette or sportsmanship of allowing your opponent a response. I blew up a city, you blew up a dam - fair play. I launch a strike against Crestfallen I anticipate the potential for a response, interception, evacuation whatever - I even expected that a move would be made against Ardashirshahr to ensure that there were no further salvos but seven hundred and fifty cossacks showing up on the same day and being conceited enough to expect no difficulties in traversing the countryside nor opposition on arrival. Frankly - enough is enough. Yes it is petty and casts me in a bad light but needs must.

You had your little strop the other day when you couldn't tell the difference between a moved post and a deleted one and now I will have mine since you have forgotten that it is fundamental to give your opponent a chance to respond before following through on an initiated action. It's enough to restore your faith in unworkable recwar systems, or at least the necessity for them.

As for the git with the 'giant robot' Transformer rip offs - don't get me started. :p

So in summary - Get out of my county. Any Cossacks found loitering in the city centre attempting acts of arson will be arrested and exposed to local justice. All military activities by the Elwynnbrigaden are hereby suspended. The County of Lesser Zjandaria repledges itself in loyalty to the Imperial Crown and will withdraw its forces from Shirekeep with immediate effect. For us the war is over.
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Re: "Sightseeing"

Post by Kaiser Mors V »

ooc: I had plans for my own, and also, wouldn't have been hiding in the keep... nor would have cared about the yo-yo at that point..

so.. in the future.. let me do my own thing.... I had my own plans.... but I can work with this.

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Re: "Sightseeing"

Post by Maksym Hadjimehmetov »

Read the Grand Muster - see where the barracks are on the map and use your noggin you great tit
Now, if I hadn't read the Grand Muster I wouldn't have known what road I was attacking from, nor would I know of the existence of the flak towers. Whether I choose to attack the barracks or not is, quite frankly, my perogative, you great tit ;)
As for the matter of a river crossing, I kind of assumed that if one is to construct a large city such as Ardashirshah in such close proximity to a river, as well as maintain a dam and your much-loved flooded national park, there must be a bridge across the river. Before you attack me (as is, of course, quite inevitable) on the fact that I'm merely assuming the presence of a bridge, you should remember that assumption is part of the game in micronationalism- that is, unless someone actually draws diagrams of every square centimetre of their territory, which nobody will have the time nor patience to bother doing.
Missile or cossack which is going to reach its target first. Crestfallen by that reckoning is toast
I don't believe that matter was in dispute. Admittedly, I feel the Cossacks should have attacked Ardashirshah later- apologies for any inconveniences caused- but if I believed the cossacks had reached Ardashirshah before your rockets reached Crestfallen, I wouldn't have posted the situation in Crestfallen regarding the rocket attack some five or six posts ago. So no, I didn't ignore that, Crestfallen has been as ravaged as you need to satisfy your pseudo-Babkhan image as Khan of Lesser Zjandaria, so good for you.
and being conceited enough to expect no difficulties in traversing the countryside nor opposition on arrival
Of course I anticipated opposition upon arrival. Indeed, if I had not, there would have been no acknowledgement of your Flak Towers, nor would I have posted my actions against them. Please remember, my Cossacks (should you choose to accept their existence in Ardashirshah in a day or two) haven't even reached the city itself yet. As far as my post implies, they're still next to the flak towers, waiting to commence their orders.
Some of us poor bastards have to go to work and can't be on hand to give instant rebuttals to your random lunges around the map
Tell me about it- I had the same problem in many RecWars with finding the time to bother to post- I gave up halfway through one of them, as a matter of fact. The only reason why I've been posting as often as I have been with regards to the war was that the height of the war was during the New Year/Christmas period.
Not to start a flame topic Ardy, but in the last few days, you have posted a map of your capital city, several highly complex diagrams of the Elwynnbrigaden and Zjandarian Armed Forces, numerous decrees relating to the running of your county in great detail, so quite frankly if you can do those, I don't see why you can't keep consistent activity in a RecWar occurring at exactly the same time as these images and development of your county were posted. You more than anyone should know that RecWar posts need only be a few sentences long, as opposed to an entire novella romantically describing the plight of the Shirereithan citizenry. If you want, I'll just post my movements with no-frills simple sentences. Why don't we all do that?
You had your little strop the other day when you couldn't tell the difference between a moved post and a deleted one and now I will have mine since you have forgotten that it is fundamental to give your opponent a chance to respond before following through on an initiated action
The whole of the cossack attack was in one post. There was no 'following through' of a completed action to be spoken of- do as you wish to the attacking forces, or I'll magic them back to Modan-Lach if you so desire. Your wish is my command. After all, that is the only way one can win a RecWar, am I right? ;)
We didn't agree on a set time (for example, during 24 hours) in which someone had to post for any attack to be told to have succeeded. If we did set one, people would complain saying it was too short a time. If we don't, those of us with enough time on our hands get complaints from those who don't, such as yourself in this instance. This is truly a no-win situation.
As for the git with the 'giant robot' Transformer rip offs - don't get me started
Heyhey- this is fantasy. Woodrow's giant superweapon didn't exactly cause you much grief on the subject of realism during the Circum-Reynor War, so I really don't think you have much grounds for complaint against 'this git'.

Your Niftiness. You will be transported back to Alexandretta with five crates of yo-yos as compensation for any trouble we may have caused you.

Hadjimehmetov- he of the imaginary cossacks
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Re: "Sightseeing"

Post by Jacobus Loki »

(Musing) The Filipinos use yo-yos as weapons

A HA!
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Re: "Sightseeing"

Post by Kaiser Mors V »

Next recwar.. no guns...

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Re: "Sightseeing"

Post by Prodigy Almighty »

Most of the technology used in building the giant robot was real... some of it is of our own creation in a legitimate way that could work theoretically.

If the US wasn't billions and trillions of dollars in debt, the government could build a giant robot right now...

And in my defense, my HVBS doesn't transform. :D
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Re: "Sightseeing"

Post by Maksym Hadjimehmetov »

*can't be bothered to write pointless diatribe which won't result in much anyway*

SUMMARY:
Artillery still bombard Shireroth. Seeing as Ardashir won't fight anymore, I assume the jets engaged over Woodshire can return back to good old Lach. As can the Cossacks in limbo between existence and non-existence in Ardashirshah.
Seeing as I'm letting Yvain assume that there is a bridge across the Elwynn River at Neurac, the remainder of my forces currently in Upper Lach and defending the coast are coming to engage his forces on the Crestfall Border.
The bombers which returned to Lywind have taken off to destroy the runway and hangars at the Imperial Airfield at Teldrin
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Re: "Sightseeing"

Post by Yvain Wintersong »

OOC: I wasn't assuming that at all. My plans are to ferry troops across the river. That's why I'm so nervous about the river crossing. Although there are probably bridges there, if you have any sense at all you'll bomb them when you see me approaching.

Regarding your bombing of Teldrin, my couriers and cryptographers have been fired pending an investigation of how you learned about that so quickly.
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Re: "Sightseeing"

Post by Maksym Hadjimehmetov »

OOC- I always examine the military directives of my enemy's forum- especially if they're posted there and placed in the public domain ;)
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Re: "Sightseeing"

Post by Bayen »

Kaiser Mors V wrote:Next recwar.. no guns...
Those are interesting... we're about to start one in Toketi... ;)

Anyways....
The Kaiser sat in a very comfortable chair in his secret location. This was turning out be be very interesting... He turned to one of his officers. "Do you have any idea where that cyborg got his giant robots?" he asked offhandedly.

"If you think giant robots are strange, you're really not going to like this, my Lord," replied the officer, not facing the Kaiser.

"What are you talking about?" asked the Kaiser, slowly standing, slightly suspicious as always alliteration made him. "And what's with the puns?"

"Aw, come on, I've given you a bunch of clues at this point, m'Lord," sighed the officer. "Then again, you wouldn't be able to get the references, most likely..." He turned around. The man in the uniform was Bayen.

"You're the Tokian King, aren't you," stated Kaiser Mors. "The new immigrant."

"The very same."

"So how did you get here?"

Bayen shrugged. "I don't know if you've heard much about Gralan Magic. We have methods for finding people..." From his pocket he produced a small, red sphere with the Kaiser's room being displayed in real-time within.

"Lord of the Rings rip offs?" asked the Kaiser, raising his eyebrows.

"Meh, the Law of Narrative Intertextuality, as Andreas puts it," replied Bayen, chuckling as he replaced the glowing sphere. "Anyways, I've got considerable forces behind me, magical and otherwise. If you need anything, just ask." He turned to leave.

"Aren't you going to give me a phone number or something?"

"Oh." Bayen pulled a second, blue sphere from his pocket. "This one won't let you scry, but you can contact me with it... just say my name..." He tossed the blue sphere to the Kaiser. "Let me know what you need." With that, Bayen made a quick gesture and with a puff of orange and green smoke, disappeared.
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Re: "Sightseeing"

Post by Prodigy Almighty »

OOC: Ah, I'd forgotten they let you use magic... does anyone mind if I pop my dragon in? :D

I jest, of course... a giant robot AND a dragon would just make this unfair and uninteresting...
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Re: "Sightseeing"

Post by hypatias mom »

I don't know--it sounds like shades of Godzilla Meets Megalon to me.
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Re: "Sightseeing"

Post by Bayen »

Prodigy Almighty wrote:OOC: Ah, I'd forgotten they let you use magic... does anyone mind if I pop my dragon in? :D

I jest, of course... a giant robot AND a dragon would just make this unfair and uninteresting...
And yet, you'll be using that and more in the Tokian Guild War... do I smell self-contradiction? :rolleyes
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Re: "Sightseeing"

Post by Kaiser Mors V »

Next rec-war.. No Magic...

And No using the Kaiser without permission...

I think it's time for the big guns...(when I'm sober enough to write coherently...)

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Re: "Sightseeing"

Post by Jacobus Loki »

This must end. :nuclear
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Re: "Sightseeing"

Post by Kaiser Mors V »

Agreed

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Re: "Sightseeing"

Post by Maksym Hadjimehmetov »

Can I claim winning by default? :document
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Re: "Sightseeing"

Post by Ari Rahikkala »

* reads the latest posts *

I am reminded of the War of the Orchids, and what some people including me did there as Istvanistani... everything was going swimmingly until we came along and spammed the place up with, well, the kind of things that the Istvanistani people say ;). We got a prompt yelling-at and were apparently forgotten by history...
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Re: "Sightseeing"

Post by Aurangzeb Khan »

Heyhey- this is fantasy. Woodrow's giant superweapon didn't exactly cause you much grief on the subject of realism during the Circum-Reynor War, so I really don't think you have much grounds for complaint against 'this git'.
I know I know but if you recall me and Extreme got fed up and 'confiscated' the damned thing.
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Re: "Sightseeing"

Post by HIH Hesam Jahandar »

Ari, You were in the Orchid Wars? I barely remember that. :angel
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Re: "Sightseeing"

Post by Ari Rahikkala »

Only for a couple of posts with Stjepan and dStryker...
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Re: "Sightseeing"

Post by Nick Foghorn Leghorn »

I claim victory because:

OBJECTIVES:

1. Retaliation for invasion. COMPLETED.

2. Remove Kaiser from the throne. TECHNICALLY COMPLETED.

3. Have fun. COMPLETED.
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Re: "Sightseeing"

Post by Prodigy Almighty »

I claim victory because:

1. Kaiser is alive: COMPLETE

2. Employed my giant robot for the first time in war: COMPLETE

3. LASER BEAM TANKS!: COMPLETE

4. Didn't get yelled at too much by other participants: MOSTLY COMPLETE

5. Have fun: How could I not? :D
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