Ship on shore

[Franz Fritzelmann]

The explorer sailorsteamboat 'Sozialismus Ohnesorg' drives along the shore of Shireroth.



Cpt. Frnaz Fritzelmann, the world's most popular explorer looks through spyglass

Mate, we have shortness of provisions. Let's go ashore!

A rowing boat comes to land.





Dear, unknown new world! In the name of the great comrade Hirschie I engross this land to give it the socialism and the religion of the Holly Bennybunny. Should here are natives, I offer domesticating this savage people.

[Kaiser Hasan I]

Sorry matey, I gave at the office, try the neighbors though, I hear they're loaded and rumour has it, they burn Tudeh socialists at the stake!



http://www.babkha.com/forum/

[Jonas]

The commies arrived!
Your Niftiness, show that we don't want socialism! We can build a Gulag if they want

[Franz Fritzelmann]

Dear savage natives, give us a chance to convince you. This are our missionaries. They want to talk to you.

[Jonas]

Missionaries? We have Malarbor!

[Kaiser Hasan I]

Alright, but I warn you, you better not be after our most sacred treasure:

The Shirerothian Treasure of Typhoid-ridden blankets!



and up close you, can see the glorious microscopic jewels that cover our sacred blankets....

[Franz Fritzelmann]

The missionaries say: "We don't know malaborism. Superstitiousness! Only the great comrade Hirschie and his holly Bennybunny make a heaven on earth! Why do you threaten us with violence of microorganisms? We don't want to fight."

[Kaiser Hasan I]

micronations : micro-organisms

[Jonas]

The missionaries say: "We don't know malaborism. Superstitiousness! Only the great comrade Hirschie and his holly Bennybunny make a heaven on earth! Why do you threaten us with violence of microorganisms? We don't want to fight."

A heaven? Malarbor isn't someone that gives you a heaven on Micras! He's a terrible, but loved, tree demon that scares missionaries.

http://www.shireroth.org/shirewiki/Malarbor

[Franz Fritzelmann]

Soldiers and missionaries move back to the ship. There they discuss about further methods.

[hypatias mom]

I hope your missionaries realize that Shireroth is well-populated with a non-savage population, is well-governed, and that the people have their own religions and have little use for your missionaries. Go peddle your strange beliefs elsewhere.

[Andreas the Wise]

Or, alternatively, come to Kildare where one of your men already set up a business ...

[Franz Fritzelmann]

Some explorers come back.

We give you magic objects. For example, this ... you can see yourself. We call it holly mirror. Furthermore we have this ... holly glass beads. All in all very valuable. We give it you with best wishes of the white father Hirschie. And you give us a piece of land, we can build bennybunny's chapel, you don't?

[Kaiser Hasan I]

Multi-temple.

[Franz Fritzelmann]

Ah, is it allowed? Excellent! I'm very eases, that we don't have to capture New ASSRAZ, I mean Wilde-Shireroth in a military way. Tell me something about your treasures.

[hypatias mom]

You might consider, while you are building a temple, that the word is holy, not holly. The first refers to a diety; the second is a kind of evergreen tree, usually with red berries.

[Franz Fritzelmann]

RED berries are wonderful. We're looking for south fruits. Where can I find such fruits?

*blares*
SAILOOOOOOORRRRRSSS! Pick up red berries, immediately!

[Kaiser Hasan I]

Shireroth is also famous for it's mangoes.



Infact, we're a bit obsessed with them.

[Jonas]

Did someone say Mangoes?

[Franz Fritzelmann]

I've never seen a mangoe before. It looks like a little pig. Squeks it?

[Aurangzeb Khan]

Please send the missionaries to my palace in Ardashirshahr. I happen to be hungry and a good theological discussion always gives me a hearty appetite which would be good before I eat them... err... eat with them. Yes that is what I meant. Eat with them, break bread like good honest Zurvan fearing folk. Honestly, eating people... what sort of crazy savage would do a thing like that?

Anyway, send them round. Feast will begin promptly upon their arrival. I will send some gentlemen down to the beach shortly to fetch them.

[hypatias mom]

A mango is a sweet tropical fruit with a large, white pit (or seed) inside. It is eaten raw or cooked, and is good in sauces over fish and chicken.

[Aurangzeb Khan]

As these infidels have brought the contagion of communism to these shores it has been resolved to execute the entire party (with the possible exception of Andreas).

[Andreas the Wise]

Ok ... I'll choose to take that as a compliment