The Cult of Dionysus

[Bacchus]

I have actually been driven a bit on edge. Studying the classics is so not worth it. Every single inconsistency, innuendo, missing section, epithet, name, city, house is another tiny weight on my back and my eyelids. Benkern won't be coming around here anymore.

Harken! harken to me, Shirerithians, followers of so many confusing gods and politicians! There is no greater crime than to never let oneself go and enjoy life. The people of this nation are great criminals. I'm here to save you all.

Can you hear it? The jingling of bells, the shake of leafy boughs, the slam of the thyrsus on the ground and then- from the ground, jets of sweet honey and wine! Observe them scrape away just the surface of the earth and beneath, pure milk, granted by the god. These are my maenads, the faithful followers of Dionysus, my god and my only refuge.

Bacchus cannot see himself "setting up shop" like a regimented merchant in this Temple that has been constructed. Does he need a permit? The Cult shall be established somewhere here, in this land, where the people are wise and receptive and good. And better they shall be for it, for Dionysus is the only way to truly be free.

[Aurangzeb Khan]

Anybody know much about drafting a Senatus consultum ultimum? We may be needing one sharpish...

[Scott of Hyperborea]

As everyone except Erik knows, Shireroth is an Apollonian country. Any country that is Apollonian cannot be Dionysian. QED.

[Bacchus]

Scott, you would be the one. This is the issue at hand. Let Shireroth be free of its self-imposed imprisonment, the will of order! Let the overwhelming will of the god consume and feed us all, one, the citizens of this nation. Kaiser- Duke- Baron- Count- Freeman- Slave- Mondesian- they are all the same to the god, he calls them all to his rites equally. It has been revealed to me by Bacchus that the rites will not first be accepted in Elwynn, so let me try to appease him in some other corner of Shireroth. Brookshire will do nicely.

[Leo Fenrir]

This Chaos! So scary. Bacchus know that I oppose this Cult on religious, and personal grounds and will do everything in my power to stop it spreading into the great nation of Shireroth.

[Aurangzeb Khan]

Shall I have Albert fetch the Vorlon Inquisitor?

[Gman Russell]

the hell is this? Haha...

[Shyriath]

*Looks on with amusement*

[Bacchus]

Leo, oppose the will of the god and you will be denied the greatest happiness one can ever be afforded. Your own refusal to believe is a far worse punishment than Dionysus could ever deliver. Can't you hear him? He's there, calling out. He's you, calling out from inside, shouting crying screaming in an act of defiance against the ordered facade we all maintain. Let him free and let yourself free in doing so. Join the dance and experience the ecstacy of... nothing. A lack of responsibility, of free will, of desire- simply acting according to the divine will. To serve him is to be free; to lose everything is to gain everything. Letting go is the first step. Hold tight to those personal grounds of yours if you must, but how truly personal they are and what good they will do you I do wonder.

Shyriath, to watch the dance may be enjoyable, but to know the rites is a greater joy still.

And Ardashir, I might be a religious fanatic now, but I can still recognise the fact that Bablyon 5's a pile of shit. :P

[Gman Russell]

Ok, you've pissed me off now.

You can start whatever crazy-ass religion you want to, but when you insult my favorite television show, you speak with words I will one day choke you with.

[Bacchus]

Calm down, have some wine. Merlot, 2004. Mahogany Mountain- it's Californian, and not bad.

I was only making a reference to another TV show. I don't suppose you're a Spaced fan?

[Leo Fenrir]

Without structure there is no economy. And no wine to get drunk with!

[Aurangzeb Khan]

And Ardashir, I might be a religious fanatic now, but I can still recognise the fact that Bablyon 5's a pile of shit. :P

That quote could have come verbatim from an episode of Spaced.

[Bacchus]

Further, Hawk the Slayer's rubbish.

[Aurangzeb Khan]

GET OUT!

[Allot]

I concur. Fetch the cudgels.

[Aurangzeb Khan]

Wait I have a better punishment to hand. Vogon poetry!

Let it be known across the nation,
There is only one truth that bears relation;
For this to me is a singular revelation,
That the path to lasting gratification,
Can only come through permanent intoxication.

[Gman Russell]

Bravo!

[Shyriath]

Shyriath, to watch the dance may be enjoyable, but to know the rites is a greater joy still.

But better than both is spicy chicken. Seek not to turn me from my God! B'caw hath provided; spurn his gifts at thy own peril!

[Bacchus]

I will concede, Shyriath, that there is nothing better than some good chicken after a night of thoroughly examining Bacchus' rites. Except maybe a kebab, but there is no deity representing that particular foodstuff, except perhaps Ataturk. Bacchus and B'Caw do not have a conflict of interest, and as such I wish you well in your cult practices.

And Ardashir, while the concepts expressed were truly inspired by Dionysus, I died a little on the inside when I read that work of yours.

[Aurangzeb Khan]

I told you it was Vogon didn't I. All poetry is shit and its the least you bastards deserve...

[Jacobus Loki]

Oh, let Bacchus alone.

Bachannals always end with hangovers, and the reign of Bacchus gives way to the Reign of Ugh.

It's a Circle of Life kind of thing.

Thus sayeth Loki.

[Aurangzeb Khan]

[Jacobus Loki]

Besdies, to paraphrase Mark Twain,, when the magic of science meets the magic of fol-de-rol, the magic of fol-de-rol gets left.

I say we wait for the Bacchanals to really get going, and steal their wallets.

[Bacchus]

I did my classics exam this afternoon and there was no catharsis. I will sleep on it and see if the situation remedies itself.

[Jacobus Loki]

Give Odysseus my regards. One of my favorites.