"Sir Sir! We've broken down the door!" said Jess's assistant Bjarn
"Fantastic, but what door?" Asked Jess
"The doggy door, sir."
"What good will that do us?"
"I do not know..."
"Fudgecakes..."
Jess breifly thought to himself, then got sidetracked looking at the hot concubines the Duke secretly had running around the palace, nude of course.
"If we shall destroy the palace, tonight shall be the night" He thought, outloud.
After an hour or so of hard thinking he gave specific, yet brief instructions to Bjarn to instruct the MKP to execute.
Bjarn had did exactly what Jess had commanded him to do. The palace was burned to a crisp, but the Duke and Kaiseress had attempted to flee to the shoreline, much to Bjarns liking they were caught and burnt over the rubble as smores. There bodies creamated together. The ashes are now in Jess's possession as ransom. The palace was later divebombed. Jess had set out to do what was impossible, yet it worked. No one was standing in his way."Bjarn,
Please destroy the Duchal palace, this is our only chance, gosh darn it! Anywho, this is how you will do it.
Firstlike, Distract the idiot guards encompassing the palace, give them a chew toy or something, an easy distraction that will wear off in about an hour. Quickly spray laughing gas so they will poop themselfs and have to change uniforms. That will be the que for the MKP to surround the compound. Have the frontline men stand at each gate, yet unable to be seen by the Guards.
Swiftly then invade the gates, spreading 3-4 lines around the entire fortress, with the cavalry in the back, then spray more noxious and laughing gas through the intake ducts of the Air Conditioner, because of course, it will be a "hot" night in the palace. Make sure all of our guard is safe then. Lastly, burn the palace with all of the people in side it. It would be best to use kerosene or gasoline as a burning agent. Evacuate the compound immeadiatly, although feel free to make smores over the rubble of the fortress.
An hour or so after you have evacuated, divebomb the fort.
That is all,
Jess, Rightfull Duke
Jess read a public letter to the People of Yardistan the following morning.
"Dear Fellow Yardistanis,
The Duke and Kaiseress are now dead. How um, unfortunate? No. This is a great victory for justice. Tyranny is gone. I declare myself as Duke of Yardistan! I dont quite know about the Kaiseress' position. This coup may be put down by all the other duchies. But not us, no. "