The laws of Alexandretta

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Pandora
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The laws of Alexandretta

Post by Pandora »

1. All clothing is illegal within the county of Alexandretta. If you must bring that oppressive attire here please keep it within the confines of a suitcase or other such parcel. Rental lockers are available at all entrance gates.

2. All actions and discussions in public are to be some what clean. We must take extra measures to insure everyone´s physical and emotional safety with the first and foremost law in effect. The countess reserves the right to decide whither or not questionable actions and/or discussions are clean.

3. If you are smoking, you better be on fire. For if not, you will be very soon, at the stake. I have read in teh past history of people smoking here. I am allergic to many forms of smoke. It would not be nice to make the countess to go into shock now would it?

4. All fabric containing wool is also illegal here. I am also allergic to wool as well. If anyone has any complaints about my allergies, please take them to the one who made me.

5. Key limes and anything containing them are illegal as well. Take a big guess as to why.

6. No posting to the effect of boredom. With all due respect, nauseating to read people whining in very long meaningful posts about meaningless things. If you have nothing interesting to say, say it else ware.

7. The old seven deadly sin laws:

7a) Sloth
Being lazy, when it is within both your power and your rights to not be so.

7b) Lust
Don´t desire to annex your neighbor's wife, husband, or objects.

7c) Gluttony
DO NOT take too much upon yourself.

7d)Wrath
Unprovoked anger is illegal, as is provoking anger.

7e)Pride
Humility is a good thing.

7f)Envy
Don't whine about how your friends, neighbors, relatives, etc have it so much better. Appreciate what you have .

7g)Greed
Being greedy is not only illegal, it's mean too.

7h) Stupidity
Blatant stupidity, though mildly amusing at times, is also illegal.


I have edited it somewhat. The original can be found here. http://shireroth.kuroshiro.net/forum2/v ... php?t=4799 It was never made official. I´m making it official now. I especially like law 7h being that I am also allergic to stupid people. I somehow think Yardistanians with have a hard time with 7b though, just a hunch.

8) The countess shall edit and add to these laws whenever and for whatever reason that pleases her!
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Braden Indianensis
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Post by Braden Indianensis »

*Walks in wearing a merino sweater (sheep are smelly animals, as well as the second-most-stupid animals in the world...their only purposes are to be made into sweaters or roasted on a spit)*
Many of your laws violate freedom of expression in order to preserve order or the percieved morals of other people...thought you ought to know...Of course, in Shireroth, you have the right to do that.

"That the only purpose for which power can be rightfully exercised over any member of a civilized community, against his will, is to prevent harm to others. His own good, either physical or moral, is not a sufficient warrant."--JS Mill
Of course, since you have no subjects and are only doing it for yourself, the above quote is moot in this case...you have the right to prescribe such rules.
Antican Ambassador to Shireroth and Babkha
Former Speaker of the Assembly of the Republic of Antica
Reporter for the Antican Liberator
Elder Guard of the Order of the Vorpal Blade

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Ari Rahikkala
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Post by Ari Rahikkala »

/me kicks Baldwin... in a not-wrathful way...
No-one should be without a parasol, Sirocco.

Kaiseress Carol
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Post by Kaiseress Carol »

Baldwin--

As long as the Countess is not in insurrection against the Crown, she is free to establish any rules she chooses. I choose to honor her rules when I am in her county, as a sign of respect.
Kaiseress Carol

Conglacio
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Post by Conglacio »

with some of these, especially #2, is it the thought or the manisfestation of it that is illegal?
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WolvinX84
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Post by WolvinX84 »

*walks in naked*

It is rather liberating here. Though a bit drafty.
Count of Modan-Lach
Let the dream of confusion lead you into the virgin light.

Pandora
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Post by Pandora »

Baldwin PlantagenetJulii wrote:*Walks in wearing a merino sweater (sheep are smelly animals, as well as the second-most-stupid animals in the world...their only purposes are to be made into sweaters or roasted on a spit)*
*Countess Pandora claps her hands, Mr. Baldwin's merino sweater is set ablaze in a poof! The remaining ashes fall to the ground in a little ring around Mr. Baldwin. He stand there with his jaw gaping*

There that's much better!

mmmmm...bbq lamb on a spit! Let's do that at teh fiesta!

*calls to one of her servents*

Athena! Go fetch the mango salsa maranade!

*Athena bows and scurrys off*
Baldwin PlantagenetJulii wrote:Many of your laws violate freedom of expression in order to preserve order or the percieved morals of other people...thought you ought to know...Of course, in Shireroth, you have the right to do that.
Thank you for pointing that out, Mr. Baldwin. I do know that. ***It's not like we're in The United States of America or any other silly country that promotes silly ideas like democracy! This is good o' Shireroth that promotes good o' fashioned imperialism!
Conglacio wrote:with some of these, especially #2, is it the thought or the manisfestation of it that is illegal?
No of course not! You are free to think what ever you wish! Dream what ever you wish to dream. Just wash your own sheets after.
WolvinX84 wrote:*walks in naked*

It is rather liberating here. Though a bit drafty.
I'm glad to see you fit right in! Thank you! It may be but it is sooooo much cheaper than air conditioning!

*beams*

Come! Let's away to the fiesta! *Tosses marti gras beads into the air*




***Disclaimer: Dear secret-service-goverment-type-people who's sopposed to not spy on it's citizens but are doing it anyway: I love the USA. I love democracy. I'm patriotic. I'm not plotting against the USA. Just remember that before you label me, put me on a terrorist watch list and bring me in for questioning!!!
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WolvinX84
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Post by WolvinX84 »

You know they will anyways. The Government types care little for disclaimers.
Count of Modan-Lach
Let the dream of confusion lead you into the virgin light.

Conglacio
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Post by Conglacio »

No of course not! You are free to think what ever you wish! Dream what ever you wish to dream.
That's allright then, otherwise I would never be able to look in the mirror!

*gazes longingly at self*
You know they will anyways. The Government types care little for disclaimers.
No one expects the American Inquisition! (Except when they turn up in Hummers)[/quote]
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Pandora
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Post by Pandora »

Conglacio wrote:*gazes longingly at self*
I see we have a lot in common!

*does the same in her own mirror*
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WolvinX84
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Post by WolvinX84 »

*A servant gives Pandora a large, body length mirror.*

From the Count of Modan-Lach M'lady.

*Servant bows and leaves*
Count of Modan-Lach
Let the dream of confusion lead you into the virgin light.

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