Shireroth

In events I don't want to detail again, lest I feel stupid, I wrote up a story detailing a dream I had which strongly reminds me of cheap zombie movies. But the very end of the dream, instants, before I woke up, had a change in mood so drastic that I had to write about it.

So I'm in an awkward situation now. I don't usually write about clichés. It's helped havingthe narrator highlight them as bogus in the story itself, but it's still a lot like a cheap zombie movie.

Still, it has something. I'm not sure what... but I've put it up on my website.

So, here you go...

Unexpected.

Hm.. it's nice, not drooling material for me, primarily because... you should tone down the "I've seen this on TV, but this isn't TV, this is real" thing a bit. We're smart readers, we know that merely having seen zombie movies doesn't make you any less scared in the zombie apocalypse, and saying "this is real" in a story is my personal pet peeve.

(I had more to say but I'm in a bit of a hurry - let's see if it still feels that important in the evening)

I'm not going to tone down on anything. :P Writing about a dream is something I do once, not over and over again, especially if it's something I wouldn't usually write about. (Didn't I highlight that enough already?)

There will not be a second version of this. (Well. Unless I fix its spelling and grammatical errors.)

That's not to say I don't want you telling me what you had in mind - I would love that! - just, usually when people part with constructive criticism, they do it because there's a chance it'll be incorporated.

Edit -

Coincidentially, just for the record and completion's sake:

we know that merely having seen zombie movies doesn't make you any less scared in the zombie apocalypse

Untrue. I would not write like that if I didn't think like it. I'd constantly feel somehow cheated on by fate if that really happened. I mean, honestly. You have a better chance of being hit by a meteor. Right. Squat. On. The. Head.

Not to mention that, unlike the narrator, I hate those movies. ^_~ With a passion.

Then let me rephrase that advice: I understand you will let that story stand as it is, but please, for my sake, don't ever tickle that pet peeve of mine *again* .

Oh, all right. Or I'll put a huge disclaimer next to the story. "Ari, don't read this, it'll make you depressed." Would that work? ^_^