Rhyming Quatrains, TO THE DEATH!

[Kaiser Jayatar]

Loki you silly throne pretender!
I challenge you to a dual of verse,
On my word's sharp edge you will surrender,
From the Crown I will remove your curse!

Armed with rhythm and a sense of wit
Forged by a wordsmith until razor sharp,
Under weapons of verse you shall submit!
Or a crown for you then, matched best with a harp!

Fighting words, I now present,
If you stand to take the dual!
I know it's me you will resent,
In the end, you will look the fool!

Let this be the means to decide,
Who stands fit to wear the crown
When one falls to verbicide,
The other Kinged with sword of noun.

So will you face me with confidence?
With cutting words of written reason?
In Malarbor I put royal providence,
By March's namesake, 'Tis war this season!

[Jess]

Jayatar, might as well kill himself with a Shimitar
He might as well shoot himself in the face,
or spray himself with a can of Mace!

He will never be Kaiser!
We all know Jacobus is wiser!
Jacobus is our Rightful Kaiser!

Jayatar, a Babkhan?
What are his supporters Smokin'?
He deserves no token!

He might enslave us all!
Then Shireroth would most likely fall!

He wants a civil war?
Hit his head with the prison door!

The angry shouts of all sane Shirithians cry out the name of the un-hokey,
LOKI LOKI LOKI LOKI LOKI!


oh look! theres Jayatar in 5 days!

[Kaiser Jayatar]

First of all, that is in extremely bad taste. That is an actual dead man, not a cartoon for your amusement. Regardless of who he was and what he did in life, its not acceptable. Second of all, he is Iraqi, which is an entirely different ethnicity from Persian culture which Babkha perpetuates. You just come across as ignorant and crass. I was hoping that after your "penisberg| login, you'd have learned to show a little restraint and carry yourself with some taste, but it seems I am competing against the lowest common denominator. If you're going to speak on Jacobus' behalf, at least don't embarrass him.

[Erik Mortis]

Let's not have pictures of dead/dieing folk. If you don't remove it by the next time I login I'll remove it.

[Maksym Hadjimehmetov]

*logs in to write a verse or two*
*comes across picture of dead Iraqi*
...
*logs out*

[Braden Indianensis]

Come now, how do we know he's Iraqi?

Even disregarding the dead Middle Eastern fellow, Jayatar's poem was much better. That's one point for him on the Kaiser Scorecard.

[Kaiser Jayatar]

We know the man in the picture is Iraqi because it is a picture of Uday Hussein.

[Braden Indianensis]

Ech...so it is...

How perfectly morbid!

[Liam conToketi]

Ok, Jess, as Loki II's chosen Steward-to-be, I demand you shut the hell up. You're trying to help but you're failing miserable...

...And those weren't even quatrains...

[h4773r's Herald]

*H4773r drops his cloak, sheaths his sword, pulls the shades down to the edge of his nose, and grabs the mic. A shade appears with turn tables, holding a pair of ethereal earphones to its "head", you here an intro scratch from beyond*

*mutters to self* style . . .
*to the shade* gimme a phat beat, keep it tight,
make sure you can tap a toe to it.
*listens* yeah, yeah, oooh, thats right.
*to the audience* aright, lets do it!

I'm Dungeon Master of Ceremonies h4773r
representin for my home boy Loki number two
I'm a Nerdcore rapper, not one madder
bout to get hyped now, and this is what it do.


Sorry bout jess, aint much we can do,
hope that he redress then we all be coo
as for me, ill be singin tonight
as you can see, trying to make it alright

That Hesam wants the mango throne, there is no doubt
hes willing to go the mile, and appears to be devote
I'll give props to the Babkahn and his goal, they ring true
and should he wear that crown, i kneel before him, too

But that aint why im standing here
addressing the congregation
im fanning the flames for the rightful heir
this is a political conflagration

Loki II ("eye eye")
the rightful ascendant
is temporarily bye bye
so i chose to be his defendant

He was steward before any of this
His dark past he did quell
his record sofar has not been amiss
(oh . . and Hesam? its spelled d-u-E-l)

sorry, little jab,
keeps the crowd pleased
dont doze off and take a nap
the lyrical gods i do appease

The Kaiser i purpose follows tradition as well as law
He is number two of past leaders instead of a distant line
To steer our nation his is fighting tooth and claw
and one with such dedication, suits me just fine

upon my return he engaged me,
openly welcomed me back
i didnt even know hesam was citizenry
until after Mors' fatal attack

I could start attacking the competition
but i let that be up to them
to be civil is my mission
i'll save my mud for a last ditch stratagem

Im gonna wind this up right now
and i know its got a little scatter
also, apostrophes make me go "ow"
By my H47, this is out, from H4773r

[Yvain Wintersong]

Remind me when all this is over to teach a class on poetic meter in the university. Short version - unless you're deliberately using a form that does things otherwise, each line should have a similar number of beats, and the stresses should go in a regular pattern.

In the meantime, while you guys are quatraining away, I prefer to write a Shakespearean sonnet on the matter. An elegant weapon, for a more civilized age:

When, for the lack of prophets, laws, or heirs
Factions should try to seize the crown by force
And, 'ere the grave-dirt settles over Mors
Involve the lawless land with martial cares,

How loudly hear the partisans exclaim
Hesam's too Babkhan, Jacobus too bland
The one, too weak to ever rule the land
The other, foreign, with a foreign name.

Let these two fight their war - but is there not
One stronger still, these factions to gainsay
Loyal as Erik, older than Sakat
Wiser than Ari on his wisest day?

Who can provide our ship of state safe harbour?
Only one tree - support Kaiser Malarbor!

[Braden Indianensis]

Dear God.

Seriously, though. This whole thing's becoming an annoyance. Why don't you just make Hatter or someone Kaiser? What about Jonas?

[Jonas]

Dear God.

Seriously, though. This whole thing's becoming an annoyance. Why don't you just make Hatter or someone Kaiser? What about Jonas?

I'm happy enough with my position as Praetor. I'm more a servant then a leader. But thanks you mentioned it, I'm happy that people think on my

[Erik Mortis]

I nominate me! wait.. I was just Kaiser.. nevermind.

[Kaiser Jayatar]

Erik, would you mind changing that image back to its original? The "My Little Pony" is equally as grotesque. I think I just vomited in my mouth a little.

[Andreas the Wise]

@ Yvain - beautifully done. I definitely agree on the meter thing - was thinking that myself, reading H47's post ...

[Kaiser Doran II]

I thought my structure was rather good considering it was off the cuff. I'll try to be more orthodox for the next round. I'd just like to give Jacobus a chance to reply since this challenge was directed at him.

[Prodigy Almighty]

A master of rhythm, that's what they say
No one better has been found to this day
That's not what they say about me, not at all
But of the opponent to the one who will fall

For there can only be one chosen Kaiser
Hear the people shout down from the riser
They have opinions, they make their choice
Even if no one can hear their voice

Supporters and followers matter most
The one without friends will surely be toast
Though not a democracy, opinions matter
The false Kaiser is as Mad as a H4773R

Some say Malarbor, some say Loki
Others look at Jayatar and say "Okie-dokie"
But the undecided best make pick their man
Before the proverbial s**t hits the fan

So come all you people, make yourselves known!
Lest this Golden Opportunity is flown
Raise your throats in one mighty cry
They say in America "VOTE OR DIE!"

[Erik Mortis]

Erik, would you mind changing that image back to its original? The "My Little Pony" is equally as grotesque. I think I just vomited in my mouth a little.

I figured I'de keep with the horrible spirit without the inappropriateness.

[Kaiser Jayatar]

You've achieved your aim I assure you, my formerly sparkling privy now looks like a tribute to the collective works of Jackson Pollock and my retinas have detatched thanks to your clever image.

[Chrimigules]

http://youtube.com/watch?v=8qONwyLxGaM

[Braden Indianensis]

Chris.....why???!!!!!

[h4773r's Herald]

HEY!, i looked it up on Wikki and the only requirements for a quatrain is a 4 line rhyme scheme, and they dont even have to all rhyme!

yes, perhaps more traditional forms have consistent rhythms, but im a fan of freestyle and actually harbor secret hopes of becoming a nerdcore artist.

"Loki ii as mad as a h4773r?!" you say that like it's a bad thing HAHAHAHAHHEEHEEHEEE !!!!

and braden .. . ME?! as kaiser? good lord, dont even suggest such a thing, i have a hard enough time getting my counts to behave, and i HATE all that red tape.

besides . . i dont have a bloodline, or a proper name . . bah, no thank you.

[Kaiser Jayatar]

That video was the face of Satan himself.

[Prodigy Almighty]

Now now, H4773R, I never said it was a bad thing... and I also never said I was talking about Loki. My opinion got tossed back into the air.

[hypatias mom]

Jayatar--

Don't tell me you're afraid of some cute little ponies that are a takeoff on the scene from Fantasia! I thought you could take it.

[Kaiser Hasan I]

I reject the devil in all his rainbow pony forms...

[Kaiser Loki II]

In olden days, those well schooled in rhyme were honoured in Royal Courts. There were, usually, however, not the rulers, they ranged from foole to troubadour to bard.

I love Shakespeare, but Queen Elizabeth saved England.

[Kaiser Hasan I]

You're lucky I'm a Monarchist.

However, Philosopher Kings have made their mark on history as well.

[Kaiser Loki II]

True, but frequently contemporary praise for their work was based on their position rather than their talent.